I was having lunch at an outdoor cafe with a new friend of mine the other day. I say “new” because I met him after I had quit smoking about a year and a half ago. Therefore, he’d never known me as a smoker nor had I ever shared with him my history of smoking.

A few tables away sat another couple, one of whom was relaxing with an after-lunch cigarette. My friend spotted him and immediately began ranting (the way so many non-smokers do) about how idiotic smokers are. Now, even though I no longer smoke, I did take offense to his comments – so much so that I felt the need to speak up in defense of smokers.

I explained to him that no matter when, why, or how a smoker starts smoking, it quickly becomes a powerful addiction. In fact, the addiction to cigarettes is far more powerful and difficult to quit than the addictions to heroine, cocaine, and all the other addictive drugs. That’s because cigarettes and the chemicals found in them attack people from so many different angles – physically, psychologically, and habitually. Add to that the fact that cigarettes are legal and easy to obtain (as opposed to any of the other illicit drugs) and it’s easy to see why it’s so difficult for smokers to stop.

The Centers for Disease Control have been airing new videos aimed at illustrating some of the more serious effects of smoking. My reaction to watching them is to realize, even more so, just how addictive smoking really is. I mean, if people continue smoking to the point of suffering such catastrophic physical disabilities as demonstrated by the people in these videos then it must be one helluva difficult addiction to break. Posted here are a just a couple of the new CDC video ads. Take a look and let me know what you think:

Today is my 18 month quit anniversary. It was on September 29th, 2010 at exactly 9:25AM that I snuffed out my last cigarette. I’m still amazed that, after being a prisoner to my smoking addiction for more than 40 years, I was finally able to beat it. Hallelujah!

Last night, in the middle of the night, I awoke after having had a very disturbing dream. Although not identical, I’ve had similar dreams on various occasions ever since I quit smoking. The general theme of these dreams goes something like this:

I’m in the middle of doing something (regular dream activities, whatever they might be) when I notice a lit cigarette in my hand. I take a drag as I look down at my shirt pocket where I see a half-empty pack of cigarettes inside. It’s at this point that I recall that I’ve quit smoking and am doing something that I shouldn’t be. With that realization I immediately toss my lit cigarette down and discard the pack from my pocket, trying desperately to convince myself that it was just a minor slip up and that it won’t happen again. Failing that, all at once I become overwhelmed with feelings of guilt, shame, and disappointment in myself for having ruined a perfect record of smoking sobriety. It’s at this point that I wake up and, for at least a couple of minutes, continue to believe that I’ve started smoking again and feeling like I’m a complete failure.

For the first couple of months after I quit smoking I was having these dreams on a regular basis. Puzzled by them, I did some Internet research and discovered a little-known phenomenon called “Using Dreams.” From what I read, recovering drug addicts frequently dream about using their drug(s) of choice for some time after having quit. Some of them actually report feeling high in those dreams, as if they’re actually using the drugs. I couldn’t find an explanation or interpretation of what those dreams actually mean, however, for myself I can appreciate certain benefits from having them:

Each time I have one of these dreams I eventually wake up long enough to realize that it was, after all, just a dream, and that I’m still a non-smoker. My feelings of guilt, shame, and disappointment are suddenly washed away with a renewed sense of accomplishment. The dreams remind me once again that my addiction to smoking was at least as powerful as any drug addiction and that I must continue to remain vigilant at all times, so as not to fall prey to that deadly addiction once again. As uncomfortable as they make me feel, I do think that my “Using Dreams” serve a valuable purpose.

This past February 24th I was admitted to the Loma Linda VA Medical Center for a scheduled lumbar laminectomy and spinal fusion surgery. Having listened to pain-filled horror stories from several friends and relatives who had undergone similar procedures, I was definitely not looking forward to this. To say I was feeling anxious over it all would be an understatement.

It has now been more than two weeks since the surgery. I came home from the hospital on February 28th. Has it been a painful experience? Yes it has, but not nearly as bad as I was anticipating. In fact, I was up walking around the very next day after my surgery and I’ve been walking every day since. I still have some pain, but each day it dissipates a little bit more. Overall, it has been completely manageable.

So, what does this have to do with smoking? Perhaps more stressful than the actual surgery itself was the stay in the hospital. There I was lying in a strange bed in a strange room with a strange roommate. Throughout the day and night, nurses and doctors would come by to poke, prod, and otherwise monitor our progress. Mind you, I understand that this was all done for our own good but apparently a hospital is the last place on earth we should turn to for a good night’s rest. Thinking back on the experience, what would I have done if I were still a smoker? Talk about stress!

There are no hospitals I’m aware of that allow smoking within their walls anymore. I can’t imagine what it would have been like as a smoker to be confined to such a stressful environment for so many days without having a cigarette. Knowing how badly I was addicted before I quit, I might have even postponed or cancelled my surgery rather than be forced to endure it all without a cigarette for such a length of time. It makes me wonder – how many others have turned down surgical or other needed procedures simply because they’re not allowed to smoke inside a hospital or other medical facility?